Today I deviated from the weekly sequence. Instead it was Surya namaskars, a couple of the standing poses, Supta Padangushtasana and Supta Baddakonasana. I may do it in the evening though. Yesterday, I just did a few restorative asanas, couldn’t bring myself to do anything else. My legs were in a fair bit of agony as I did something I have never done, running up and down stairs. They are still complaining.
There was trembling in my right leg through the day if it was under stress. It’s a good thing as the areas that need strength are making themselves felt. Training hard at times is necessary for running but also contradictory to a yoga practice. I’m sure it just agitates my nerves. Tremors are not good, they are associated with memories of a trying period for me. At the same time, I find running also keeps my spirits up and my will strong. Long distance running is an endurance activity and a good exercise in training the mind. It includes lots of failures, a few successes but mostly, it is just abhyasa. One foot in front of the other even when I think I cannot take another step.
I haven’t figured out why I am drawn to the sport even when I don’t feel like it at times. I’m not a sportsperson, neither am I fast or competitive. I don’t crave the rush of running races or collecting medals. It is not a social thing either although I do enjoy blogging about it and connecting with other runners in the invisible blogosphere. Over a long term period, it will create greater wear and tear but I am still attached to it. Why?

5 thoughts on “Why?

  1. I’m not a runner, but I imagine that long-distance running is like another form of meditation. Does it feel that way for you? Might that be why you are naturally drawn to the activity?

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  2. There is a zen like quality to the long runs. It kicks in after the first few miles especially in the dark early hours. I find an easy rhythm to my breath which happens on its own and can hear the run. It is quiet and soft, without any jagged edges.
    But it’s also a time when a lot of thoughts come up and go. More often than not, I feel calmer after a long run.
    I don’t know if that is how meditation feels…

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  3. Heh heh!
    And yet – the struggle is less sequential and more organic than that. I think, for example, that Samadhi is not something far away and “attainable” only after lifetimes of tapasya… it’s as intimate as the breath and we taste it in those moments of complete attention that take your breath away: holding your newborn baby – getting completely lost in the beauty of a sunset or a flower…

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