Why?

Today I deviated from the weekly sequence. Instead it was Surya namaskars, a couple of the standing poses, Supta Padangushtasana and Supta Baddakonasana. I may do it in the evening though. Yesterday, I just did a few restorative asanas, couldn’t bring myself to do anything else. My legs were in a fair bit of agony as I did something I have never done, running up and down stairs. They are still complaining.
There was trembling in my right leg through the day if it was under stress. It’s a good thing as the areas that need strength are making themselves felt. Training hard at times is necessary for running but also contradictory to a yoga practice. I’m sure it just agitates my nerves. Tremors are not good, they are associated with memories of a trying period for me. At the same time, I find running also keeps my spirits up and my will strong. Long distance running is an endurance activity and a good exercise in training the mind. It includes lots of failures, a few successes but mostly, it is just abhyasa. One foot in front of the other even when I think I cannot take another step.
I haven’t figured out why I am drawn to the sport even when I don’t feel like it at times. I’m not a sportsperson, neither am I fast or competitive. I don’t crave the rush of running races or collecting medals. It is not a social thing either although I do enjoy blogging about it and connecting with other runners in the invisible blogosphere. Over a long term period, it will create greater wear and tear but I am still attached to it. Why?